Seventeen days later, that blast of summer rain brought JJ his ray of hope. He smelled the barbequed burgers and hot dogs cooking on the youth center grill. “Can someone get Bucket?” he asks again. “I want something to eat.”
JJ's hunger had been apparent to The Spechtrum staff for quite some time. Sitting on that outside step, JJ hungered for what the youth center had to offer him since opening its doors to Warm Springs kids April 1st.
Bucket knew JJ's hunger wasn't just about a barbeque. The boy had scribbled his desire on a forgotten piece of paper well over a year earlier, a written promise to himself he entitled, “My dream.” Nine months earlier, Evan Lee Cummins was digging through the remains of an abandoned Warm Springs family dwelling. Broken windows, boarded doorways and scattered belongings left behind by the former tenants littered the blue house in the depressed West Hills neighborhood.
Sifting through the mess, Evan—a manager at Extraordinary Young People's Crow Youth Center in Montana—saw a note in child's handwriting thumb tacked to the wall. It read:
My dream.
I want to be good.
I want to be a cop.
I want my friend to be a cop with me, so we can make this a better place.
I really want to be good.
That is my dream.
Evan, a youth minister and a singer/songwriter, kept the note for inspiration. A neighbor told him it looked like the handwriting of the departed family's youngest child—a boy everyone called Little JJ.
“I started thinking about what JJ's life must be like, living in what The Oregonian newspaper called ‘the state's deadliest place for a child to grow up.'” Evan says. “To me, his letter was like a cry for help. He was saying, ‘I don't want to end up like other kids here.'”
“I could see this little boy getting sucked in by the rez. I wanted to encourage him, to tell him, ‘You can make something of yourself.'”
Fueled by JJ's words, scribbled on that piece of paper, Evan wrote and produced a song entitled, “Li'l JJ.” The track is set to a slow groove beat, intensified by rap lyrics containing an inspirational message:
Li'l JJ don't cry
It's about sunrise, it's coming
The time when Native Youth will rise
Don't be surprised when those teary eyes
You wipe to see bluer skies (chorus)
Li'l JJ…. There is hope for you
Li'l JJ…. Wherever you are
Li'l JJ…. You can make it through if you will follow your dream
In late April, Evan returned to Warm Springs to perform at a youth center concert. He did a quick double take when a staff member pulled him aside and said: “Hey Evan, you gotta meet this kid. He's the most unique kid you'll ever meet. They call him Little JJ.” When the boy approached, Evan knew he'd found the song's inspiration.
“Did you used to live in a blue house in the West Hills?” Evan asked JJ.
“Yeah,” JJ replied.
“Do you want to be a cop when you grow up?
“Yeah.
“Man, I wrote a song about you.”
That night, when Evan performed the song for the youth center crowd, he called JJ up on stage. “I got down on my knees and sang to him. His mom was there, and I could tell it meant a lot to her, ‘cause the family has been going through a lot of stuff.” ‘That song lifted his spirits'”
Susan Jensen had been worried about her 9-year old son for months. She had recently ended an abusive relationship with a man who had been JJ's father figure since birth.
“He retaliated by getting in fights and lashing out. He felt isolated, thought everyone was against him.” The song Li'l JJ—Evan's dedication to a boy's handwritten dream—had an immediate impact. “When Evan sang to him that night,” Susan says, “JJ turned to me and said, ‘Whoa! Mom, that's from Jesus. “That song lifted his spirits. It helped him realize that people cared for him. He listens to that song every night before he goes to bed, and he's a totally changed little boy.”
“I've improved”
As the rain continues falling on this July evening, Bucket senses the time is right to bring JJ back into the safety and comfort of the youth center walls. After 17 days of hungering, JJ has paid his price. “I've been watching you out here and I see you've improved,” he tells JJ as he approaches the cement step. “Let's talk about what you have to do to come back in.”
“The first thing I want you to know,” Bucket continues, “Is that we do want you here. I think you need to apologize to some people. If you do that, I'm willing to forget about the rest of the month and you can come back in today.
JJ jumps at the deal. “Okay. I'm really sorry. I've improved.”
With that, he's off to find that tasty-smelling barbeque. His apologies, much like his written dream to “be good,” are a work in progress. Bucket expresses hope that JJ will one day keep his promise to make Warm Springs “a better place.”
Thirty minutes later, sitting among friends at a covered picnic table, JJ's outlook is already brighter.
“This is hot dog number four,” JJ exclaims as the polishes off the final bite. “I'm full.”
A game of foosball awaits. Or maybe a shot to back up his claim, “I'm the air hockey champion.” And later that night, he'll doze off to a musical reminder that his dream is very much alive:
Don't stop because the odds they say are against you
But use to fuel your passion—Ain't no stat going to stop you
As long as you've got a dream and drive to achieve and believe
That God is with you, say He's never gonna leaveLi'l JJ….
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